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Be that person

You see that happy person over there?

He is positive in every situation, it appears that he is lucky and everything goes his way, it all just falls into place.

You might see him and feel a pang of envy, you think (or say) “Why do bad things always happen to me and not him?” or “why can’t I have what he has?”

Well I say that you can have it and all it takes are a few thoughts and a creation of habit. Read on.

1.   Study life. Think about the past (but don’t dwell), this is like a lesson review after you’ve already taken the exam, no stress and really easy. Remember how you reacted or felt during a good/bad situation. Also how did other people around you react? Did they draw closer or were they pushed away? Use these two questions to gauge what you did right or wrong, learn from this.

2.   Change your perception. Realise that perceived good and bad things happen throughout everyone’s life; shift your thinking and see that there is neither a good or bad situation but the ‘good or bad’ actually comes from you (this was a big AH-HA moment for me). By this same line of thinking you can see that a good cannot exist without a bad, therefore they must be equal. An easy word to sum this up is EXPERIENCE. You will always have experience whether it be good or bad so if you want to feel perceivably good about a situation then treat it as an experience, you will find that your thought pattern will shift and you will start to be ‘that person’.

3.    Learn by doing. Who cares if you don’t get it right the first few times, what does matter is that you are aware that you’re doing it (which can be quite hard especially when you’re stressed), don’t just be a robot and react to situations, understand how and why you are reacting. An example is if you have a car accident, you may have broken legs, a broken car and and an amount of emotional pain as well, but try and find how you have learnt from the situation happening, it might be hard to figure out, but there is always something to learn. Remember that the pain comes from you, so you can control it.

4.   Easier done than said! This is how I transformed my life, but it didn’t just pop into my head, I studied books and formed habits (this is important).  Below are a few books I can recommend that helped me transform. Read and understand them but always develop your own ideas.

Ask and It Is Given – Esther and Jerry Hicks

The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People

Who moved my cheese?

Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished. – Lao Tsu

Tags: experience, happiness, mistakes, reading, self improvement